Natasha knew how his mind worked: if he felt like he was being pushed then he would shut down completely, but if she left it open, left it all up to him though obvious she wanted to listen if he wanted to speak, then he would open up to her when he was ready, entirely unprompted.

Her brow furrowed further at his words. He made it sound like a joke, but there was obvious truth to it. He had pushed himself and then distracted himself and the outcome could have been much worse than it was. The very thought of it made her stomach sink but she determinately ignored it. He had more to say, so she stayed silent and listened.

The way he spoke made her heart ache. Did he truly believe that of himself, or just that others did? But the fact that he was admitting he needed help, that he couldn’t remember on his own and needed the file, proved how bad this whole thing had affected him.

Catching his hand in hers, she brought it to her lips, placing kisses over his palm and fingers. “If you think it will help I can see what I can do,” she replied. She had many options at her disposal. She could do as he said and speak with Maria directly, or she could call in a few ‘favours’ and get one of the underlings to pull the file for her. If that was what he wanted she would do it in a heartbeat.