Wherever You Will Go (for inevermiss)

[study_in_scarlet]

The mission was finally over and Natasha was home, a fact that left her with both relief and trepidation. For the past three weeks, besides the job at hand all she had thought about was Clint. Of course she worried; after his confession she couldn’t not worry, no matter how well he had seemed that last morning, but it wasn’t just that. Sometimes she wondered if they could really make it work, if they could have a real romantic relationship amidst their chaotic lives; sometimes she thought the entire thing was a mistake. Had they ruined their friendship? Could they ever be efficient partners again? Was it too late to go back? Could things ever be as they were between them again? Did she want them to be? Most nights she went to be determined that nothing would change, that it wasn’t worth the risk, but most mornings she awoke wishing he was there with his sleep mussed hair, his warm skin, and that content and happy smile.

Now that she was back she still wasn’t certain which side of her inner war had won; all she knew was that she had a promise to keep. Once her debriefing was concluded she went in search of her partner. It didn’t take long for her to find him, and while the counsellor’s office was not a place she liked to be, she knew Clint felt the same way. Perhaps a friendly face in the waiting room when he emerged from his session was just what the doctor ordered.

Grabbing a magazine, Natasha settled down in one of the chairs and crossed her legs, her eyes only briefly scanning each page as she flicked idly through, her eyes drawn to the clock then the door every ten seconds or so. Patience was always more Clint’s thing.

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[inevermiss]

Clint had spent his fair share of nights lying awake and thinking about the time that they had spent together, though he had considerably less questions about what it all meant. He knew what it had meant to him and he could only hope that it had meant the same to Natasha.

Since then he had kept his unspoken promise to keep fighting to get back to the man he had been. He had stopped taking unnecessary risks. Stopped chasing the release of an accidental death and had hunkered down to weather the storm.

That didn't mean that these psychiatric evaluations were any less painful or invasive. The questions the doc asked him were too obvious. To guilt centered and always made him go back to all of the pain and suffering that he had caused.

Today's session had been particularly brutal, but he'd managed to get out of it in one piece, and he hoped had managed to bluff enough to get a satisfactory stamp of approval.

As he walked out, his eye caught a flash of red and a smile dawned on his face, touching his weary looking eyes.

"You found me."