Dancing in the Dark (for farmboyhawk)

[study_in_scarlet]

They didn’t get a lot of time off together, at least not enough to make a trip away worthwhile, so for this one weekend they decided to stay in the city and play tourist for the day.

They had started with a walk through Central Park before grabbing an early lunch at one of the city’s many street vendors and then wandering through the American Museum of Natural history. Natasha found the Hall of Minerals fascinating while Clint had gotten a kick out of all the dinosaur bones. They both enjoyed laying under the big blue whale with all the normal people.

Afterwards they went to a nice restaurant for supper, blending into the crowd of normal couples as best they could and Natasha actually forgot if she was playing a role or being herself as they finished their wine and shared their desserts.

“Thank you,” she said sincerely as they left the restaurant, stepping back into the cool night air. Nearby a busker played guitar and sang with surprising melody and soul, barely seeming to notice as people threw change into his open case, so caught up was he in his music.


Comments

[study_in_scarlet]

“Stop what? I’m not doing anything,” Natasha replied innocently, and in all honesty she wasn’t doing anything more than sitting there, watching him, yet her faux innocent tone seemed to imply more.

“I suppose we will have to find another way to entertain ourselves tonight,” she continued, getting slowly to her feet. Of course she couldn’t help but reach into the shower and give Clint’s ass a quick tap on the way by; he had been asking for it, after all. “Now that was doing something.”

Giving him a mischievous smile, she disappeared out into the rest of the house to locate the candles, finding a few right where he said they would be. Setting them up on the coffee table, she trailed after him to the kitchen. “Surprise me,” she replied, running one fingertip across his broad shoulders as she passed behind him. “Matches?”

[farmboyhawk]

Clint startled slightly feeling her touch along his shoulders, the memory of her nails raking over his skin very vividly present on his mind. Yes, something to drink was a really good idea now. Preferred cold, before the power and the fridge would go out.

"Careful. You're playing with fire enough as it is."

Smiling amusedly, he handed her a half full matchbook and forced himself to turn back to the counter, before he could get lost in the sight of her barely covered breasts.

Drinks. Surprise. Right.
Well, never needed to ask a guy twice for bringing up some good liquor.

The idea wasn't to get drunk so he kept the amount of tequila to pour into his cocktail shaker very small. He made sure to add enough of that special brand of orange juice he had bought in the morning, knowing it was Natasha's favorite. One or two more ingredients to reduce the taste of alcohol next to nothing, done. Save for a few well trained shaking movements with just one hand, while he went back to the living room, bringing two glasses.

"Well, no music, either, unfortunately. Unless you want to hear my stunning Axl Rose-imitation. Then you'll just have to wait for the fourth drink."

[study_in_scarlet]

Natasha raised her eyebrows and gave him a bemused look for his pun. Shaking her head she took the matchbook and headed back into the living room to light the candles. The instantly gave the room a more homey feel and she found herself hoping that the power did go out so it didn’t have the somewhat false atmosphere of simply turning out the lights themselves.

Leaving the spent match to sit on the edge of one of the candle holders, she straightened back to her feet when Clint rejoined her with cocktail shaker and glasses in hand. “I will keep that in mind, and maybe I should mix the next round,” she said, leaning up to give him a quick kiss on the cheek. If she did the mixing then he would end up with four drinks in one the way she poured. “I’m going to go raid your closet. This isn’t exactly the warmest thing to lounge around in,” she said against his ear before heading to the bedroom.

[farmboyhawk]

"If you're doing our drinks, you won't have much fun with me tonight I'm afraid", Clint stated dryly, a little of disappointment on his face when she left to redress. Well, better for both her warmth and his self-control.

He quickly put some track pants and shirt he had left on the sofa and poured them their drinks then, thankfully holding the glass against his forehead to cool his mind. Having Natasha around for the night was just too damn tempting.

But he still meant to spend some calm, somewhat romantic time with her, so he stretched out on the sofa on his side, moving back against the back rest to leave her enough space and closed his eyes for a moment, a content smile on his lips.

"I better hear you not laughing over there, woman. I swear, it's all undercover stuff."

[study_in_scarlet]

Stripping off her towel just before she was out of view, Natasha threw it into the washroom on the way by before disappearing into the bedroom. Moving straight to the closet she started pushing aside hangers, pursing her lips at the selection. He had more clothing than any other man she knew, save for probably Tony Stark. Hearing Clint’s words she grinned and dug deeper into the back of the closet.

Less than two minutes later she emerged, leaning against the doorframe. Seeing Clint stretched out on the sofa with his eyes closed she half considered leaving him be but quickly passed that thought off. “You mean like these?”

She was wearing a pair of leather pants and a matching jacket. The pants were too big so she had to hold them up with one hand since she hadn’t bothered to find a belt. With her other arm she leaned against the wall, her arms stretched partially over her head which opened the front of the jacket just enough to show off a good portion of her tight stomach and make it very obvious that she wasn’t wearing anything under the jacket. “What job did you ever need this for? Were you infiltrating a biker gang?”

[farmboyhawk]

Turning his head at her playful voice, Clint had to try hard not to spill the sip of his drink he had just taken. Once he didn't feel like coughing tequila anymore, he started to laugh, even while his eyes were magically drawn to the unclothed parts of Natasha's body. So much for being good. That was a game two could play.

And thankfully, she had not found the worst clothes so far.

"Actually that's my outfit when I take the old lady in the garage for a ride. I thought about taking you along one day, but if you don't like the clothes..."

He pretended to pout, his eyes still roaming her body extensively.

"I don't see how that's helping you with staying warm, though." He frowned demonstratively, rubbing his chin. "Except you're trying to make me tear your clothes off your body and do the job myself. In that case get that fine ass over here."

[study_in_scarlet]

Natasha grinned when she won a laugh, and even wider at his story. Somehow she found she wouldn’t be surprised if these were actually his clothes. The jacket, at least, she thought would really suit him, and she could just imagine how good the leather would make that find ass of his look.

“No, not this time,” she said, pushing away from the wall and shaking her head. “I wouldn’t want to risk damaging these ones.” Pulling the jacket aside slightly she stroked the leather thoughtfully with her thumb, giving him just a glimpse of the valley of skin between her breasts. “Maybe you should wear this more often...”

Turning away she walked back to the bedroom and removed the leather clothes, hanging them back up where she had found them. Deciding to abandon her search for the worst clothes in his wardrobe, at least for now, she settled on an oversized hoodie and a pair of drawstring shorts. As fun as it would be to continue to tease him with a fashion show, she would much rather curl up with him on the sofa by the candlelight.

Padding back out, she stopped beside the couch to look down at him. “Better?”

[farmboyhawk]

"Well, the offer for that bike ride still stands."

Natasha revealing even more of her beautiful rack also reminded Clint that this special fantasy of his also included eating her out and fucking her hard on that bike saddle, but mentioning that wouldn't exactly help keeping his hands off her.

He watched her go with a grin, shaking his head, enjoying this harmless mood more by the second. Much too seldom he got to see Natasha like that. They definitely needed to make a habit out of this.

"Much better", he noted when she got back, snickering at the way the hoodie all but swam around her body. "Not making me want to eat you alive here and now."

Smiling, he reached out for her to pull her softly into his arms and rested his chin on her shoulder with a deep sigh. "God, I've missed this."

[study_in_scarlet]

“I may take you up on that. I’m sure I have some leather in my closet that would fit the occasion.” More than she cared to admit, probably, and some entirely inappropriate for riding a bike. Being ridden on a bike, however...

It really was rare, this completely carefree mood, and Natasha wasn’t sure how to describe it, not that she tried too hard. Some things were better left unexamined, and this was definitely one of those things.

"Mm, maybe later then," she said. Smiling warmly at Clint while he surveyed her outfit, she let him pull her into his arms and settled comfortably against him again. “Missed it? You mean in the last ten minutes?”

[farmboyhawk]

"Hey, that's long enough to go detox." Clint pinched her waist playfully but quickly wrapped his arm around her again.

"Missed sharing a bed with you. And... you know. Nice to know we don't have to watch out for bullets and bombs for once. And not having to be careful with any bandages when I want to put my hands on you."

His fingertips brushed the underside of her breasts, his leg sneaking in between hers to pull her even closer against his body.

"I think I could get used to this."

[study_in_scarlet]

Natasha squirmed against him when he pinched her but did little else. Of course they both knew that she could retaliate easily and painfully if she so wished, but what a way to ruin a mood.

It had actually been a while since they’d had a night to relax when they were both in perfect condition. It felt like lately all the crazies were crawling out of the woodwork, and when the two of them weren’t out there on the job they were nursing some wound or another. Not that that stopped them from making time for a quickie when they could, but nothing like this, not for quite some time.

Maybe never completely like this before.

She let him touch her, move her, mould her to him. She thought she could get used to it too, but the thought was a little frightening. Was he talking about just trying to spend more time together? Or more than that? Deciding she was reading too much into it, Natasha let out a slow breath.

“You just like having a human body pillow to snuggle with,” she said, lifting herself up on one elbow so she could reach for her drink and take a sip.

With another loud crack of thunder and brilliant flash of light the electricity finally gave in and went out leaving them with just the candlelight.

[farmboyhawk]

"Well, there's that pillow thing."
Clint leaned forward to give her earlobe a quick gentle bite, his knuckles again brushing her curves, before he easened his grip a bit, giving her more room to move. The last thing he wanted her to feel like was uncomfortable.

He also forbid himself every too sincere answer to her mocking and rather reached for his own glass, trying to drown his melancholy in it.
"The fact that you're my favorite person to spend time with, might have a part in it, too."

He startled, with a quiet unnerved sigh when the lights finally went down but at the same time couldn't help admiring that the dim light did an amazing thing to Natasha's hair color.

"So, finally, Greenland all over again. Can't be long before we see the first polar bears."

[study_in_scarlet]

It was clear that her joking answer wasn’t just not what he wanted to hear, but completely unwelcomed. For every two steps forward she made she seemed to take another back. They were definitely moving forward, she was getting better at the whole relationship thing, but it certainly wouldn’t be without constant stumbling.

Needless to say, when the power finally cut out Natasha was glad for the distraction it offered.

“I guess we just have more reason to keep each other warm now,” she said, setting her drink aside and further tangling her bare legs with his. Maybe they should have grabbed a blanket before settling down. “Any chance your tenants will be knocking on your door soon?”

[farmboyhawk]

"Good thing I'm a certified oven." Clint half snorted, half chuckled into his glass and half finished it with a long sip.
"Also, there's lots of blankets in the wardrobe. Just let me know." He caught one of her curls between two fingertips and pulled her in for another tender kiss.

"No need to worry, no. Haven't heard anything in the house all the time since we arrived. Mostly students, I guess they all went home to their families for the weekend."

He tried his best to keep his smile but had to hide his grimace in his glass. Just for one evening not thinking of everything he was missing in his life, was that so hard?

[study_in_scarlet]

His body temperature always was much warmer than hers, and while she usually did better with cold climates than him, he certainly provided more body heat when they needed to share. Even so, he seemed to read her mind about the blankets and she couldn’t help but smile into the kiss.

Unfortunately the tender moment passed and she felt the shift in his mood even if she couldn’t see his grimace. Shifting onto her back but keeping her side pressed to his front, Natasha ran her fingers lightly along his neck as she looked up at him, studying his face.

“That works well for us, then,” she said, tracing one finger along the line of his jaw. “That means we have the place all to ourselves all weekend.”

It was confirmation that she planned to stay the whole weekend if he wanted her to, which she was pretty sure he did, but it was also a silent acknowledgement that she knew and she understood but that it didn’t matter. The only family they needed was each other.

[farmboyhawk]

"Oh, I see where this is going." Thankful for the chance to flee into yet another bantering, Clint eyed her body from head to toe as if marking his territory. "We can try the cellar or the attic next. Maybe we should leave out the roof, unless we want to give all the residents in the surrounding houses a good show."

Before she could think about hitting him, he quickly bent down to cover her lips with another kiss. Still a slow one, but maybe not all that sweet anymore, his tongue sneaking into her mouth while he caressed her stomach, gently teasing her breasts through the thick fabric covering them.

The sweet hint of oranges mixed with her very own flavor tickled his senses, a warm content feeling of home and relaxation. He made sure to explore her mouth very thoroughly, his tongue caught in a silence dance with hers. The prick of sadness died away with every second of tenderness, his breath growing deep and steady, a smile on his lips when he could finally bring himself to pull back. What he had now was maybe not everything he had ever expected out of life, but it was good, and with her it was certainly enough.

"You can stay as long as you like, you know."

[study_in_scarlet]

Natasha managed to roll her eyes but not much else in reply to Clint’s suggestions before he cut her off with another kiss that she willingly let distract her. It was a little more heated this time and he let his hands wander a little more freely, not that she was complaining. Running her tongue along his to remind him just how good she could be with it, one hand moved to the back of his neck, fingers teasing the soft hair at his nape, while she ran her toes up along his leg until she could prop her knee over his hip, turning a little more towards him.

When he finally pulled back she was glad to see his smile had returned, though it was only because of her extensive skills that she kept her own from faltering.

It was what had made her nervous earlier, the feeling that this was leading somewhere she wasn’t sure she was ready to go. Maybe she was just being silly, but it almost sounded like Clint’s way of asking her to move in with him, but what was even sillier was the fact that this should make her nervous. Although they had taken a big step tonight, she couldn’t claim that it was all happening too quickly. It had taken them years to get to this point, years of dancing around each other and only taking the smallest serious steps at a time. If anything they had been moving at a snail’s pace compared to normal relationships.

The thing she had to ask herself, though, was would it really be a bad thing? They were away so often anyhow, and any time they had off together they spent with each other anyway, so what would really be the difference other than the location? Clint knew how much she sometimes needed her solitude, and she knew he would respect that, so what was the problem?

Okay, so maybe the silliest part of all of this was her jumping to conclusions and reading too much into what he was saying.

“Be careful,” she warned playfully, giving no hint of what was going on in her mind. “Say things like that and you may never get rid of me.”

[farmboyhawk]

Clint just stared at her for a few long moments, silently. Of course he could drop it. Would make things much easier.

But the only thing he had always expected out of this whole thing with Natasha was honesty. He could live, somehow, with everything, no matter how little, she was willing to give him, but he wanted to know where they stood. And he sure as hell didn't want to spend a weekend worrying if he made her feel bad.

"You're missing a muscle. Right here."
He let his fingertips trail from her cheek upward to brush the corner of her eye.
"Might want to train that, then your eyes match the smile.
Don't you know by now that you don't have to keep anything from me, Nat? I didn't mean to... I'm sorry if I was coming too close, okay? I don't want you to feel obliged in any way. All I'm saying is, I'm enjoying spending my time with you and I can never get enough of it. That doesn't change anything for you. You can come or leave whenever you like, okay? I'll be here."

He hesitated again, fingers softly threading through her hair, not sure if another thing going on on his mind would make it even worse or if she would understand that all he wanted to offer her was a chance. An anchor, a base to return to whenever their crazy lives let them.

"If you want... You can have a key for this apartment. You know. When you're around. Worst thing that could happen is, you could find me drunk ass standing on the sofa doing my best Freddie Mercury homage."

[study_in_scarlet]

Her smile fell when he pointed out her tell and the apology was very clear in her eyes. She tried to be honest with him, more honest than she had ever been with anyone else in her entire life, but she didn’t want to hurt him, didn’t want him thinking the worst when she just needed more time to think before she said anything.

Some days she wondered why he was even with her, why he put up with all her demons constantly trying to keep them apart, but love made people do stupid things, right? That was what she had always heard. Even so, she knew she didn’t deserve him, didn’t deserve how patient and understanding he was, how willing he was to put his own wants and needs aside for her. It wasn’t fair to him how she closed herself off sometimes, nor how long it took her to take even the smallest steps in their relationship. It wasn’t fair, she didn’t deserve him, but she wasn’t willing to give him up either. Clearly the only solution, then, was for her to try harder to be the person he deserved.

She didn’t speak even when he paused, knowing that he had more to say. It wasn’t until he was finished that she took a breath and tried to formulate a reply. He wasn’t asking her to move in here, wasn’t asking her to give up her own place, he was simply offering her another place she could escape to, a place to hide if she needed it, and a place where he would always be when she needed him. When she wanted him.

Maybe, just maybe, she always wanted him.

“That is an image I didn’t need,” she said with a smile that this time reached her eyes. Moving her hand from behind his neck she traced a finger along his lips, his cheeks, the fine lines at the corner of his eyes. “I think... I think I’d like that.”

[farmboyhawk]

"Hey, I'm doing a terrific 'I want to break free'. I'm the star on every karaoke party."
Clint pretended to pout and ended up kissing Natasha's fingertips instead, slowly, one ofter the other. He couldn't deny or hide the relief that he hadn't scared her off with his bold offer. The thought of having her around here more was intriguing, really. And hey, one more reason to finally keep this place tidy and comfortable.

He laid down on his arm to be closer to her face, to softly brush her lips, her cheeks, her neck from time to time. His hand kept on caressing her back in warm, slow circles, just slipping down to cup her buttocks in between.

He thought he would never get tired of watching her like this. The orange weak light left her hair glowing like a dark flame, her body tucked close into his for warmth far more relaxed than he could ever remember. It wasn't that bad yet with the temperatures but eventually it might be. And if they stayed like that for another while, he'd end up either sleeping in her arms or eating her for desert. Then neither of them would be in the mood to get up anymore.

"You okay, red? Need one of these blankets?"

[study_in_scarlet]

She watched as he kissed each of her fingers, wanting nothing more than to replace them with her lips, but she resisted. Instead she lay still but relaxed, letting him explore her body and feeling completely content with his gentle caresses, the complete care and adoration he seemed to have for her every spot and curve. The entire time she watched his face while he, in turn, watched her. There was something completely indescribable about the experience, and all Natasha knew was that she was enjoying it, having his complete and undivided attention and sharing such a quiet, simple moment.

A blanket probably wouldn’t be a bad idea, even though she wasn’t cold yet, and the idea of curling up with him on the sofa, cuddling under a blanket by candlelight was so ridiculously romantic and ‘cute’, yet somehow still appealing. Instead of voicing any of this, though, she just curled in closer to him, slipping one arm around his back and pressing her face against his chest. “That involves moving,” she said, which was not the most appealing prospect.

[farmboyhawk]

"Hm-hm. Guess that means I have to keep you warm myself."

Grinning, Clint let his hand travel from Natasha's waist to her leg, placing it around his. It left her pressed even closer against his body and her welcoming heat open for his caressing fingertips.

Leaving out her most sensitive spots on purpose, he gently massaged her thighs, tickling the insides with his fingertips or giving her firm buttocks the gentlest of slaps from time to time.

His face was softly buried in her hair, sighs escaping his lips while he breathed her sweet scent. The heat of their closely shared space and lingering want pulsated lazily through his body, leaving him shifting against her. But it was still a controlled, slow shuddering on his skin, not an overwhelming storm inside demanding to kiss her senseless... anywhere. All in good time.

"You smell so good", he murmured, quietly enough for her to ignore it if it wasn't the right time for compliments. "Honestly can't decide if I want to eat you whole right away or stay like this forever."

[study_in_scarlet]

Natasha wrapped her leg around Clint’s and pressed herself closer to him. He really was like a furnace, and she tangled her other leg among his, getting as much surface contact as she could. Closing her eyes and just breathing him in, she smiled against his chest, occasionally poking him in the back in retaliation to his light, teasing slaps.

She probably could have fallen asleep there, curled up safe and warm in his arms, the raging of the storm contrasting beautifully outside. It was tempting, but she didn’t want the night to end so soon; she wanted it to last, to extend the day that had been as close to perfect as any she could recall.

Chuckling against him at his words, she tightened her arm around him just slightly, essentially giving him a one armed hug. “Well, if we stay like this forever then it makes the other option impossible, right?”

Maybe not 'forever', but she could deal with 'a very long time', not that she was opposed to the other option either.

[farmboyhawk]

"Well, we do have the whole weekend..."

Determined not to tempt himself even more, Clint brought his hand back up to Natasha's neck and her spine to go back to caressing her there. Occasionally he massaged another one of these tiny knots out of her muscles when he stumbled over them, with slow, soft pressure to not hurt her but easily, softly let her slide into complete relaxation.

His attention was divided between the most pleasing sight of her body tucked so close to his and that adorable smile on her face and the equally beautiful sight of flashes cracking the sky from time to time. As long as he didn't have to deal with rain and storm influencing his shots or sensitive electronics getting wet, he could actually enjoy such a weather just fine. Especially with such wonderful company.

Only once in a while, when there was a particular loud thunder, he flinched, making a mental note to stop by the sick bay next time he was on the Helicarrier. Maybe there were any good news about the adjustments of his implants. There were sounds, especially when they were hard to calculate and expect, that hurt like fuck when you couldn't tone them down.

"Let's just hope there's not more of that coming up."

[study_in_scarlet]

The whole weekend, they had the whole weekend to do whatever they wanted and just enjoy being together; Natasha had to admit it was a pretty appealing thought. She settled a little more comfortably against him, not holding him quite so tightly as he returned to massaging her neck and back. Every once in a while she let out a content sigh or a little noise that had no real purpose or meaning except to express how comfortable and happy she was right now.

There were a few times that Clint flinched, and while it was tempting to tease him saying he was afraid of the storm, she knew it was actually out of pain and she couldn’t quite bring herself to play that down. Only when he finally spoke to acknowledge it himself did she deem it okay to comment.

Lifting her head from his chest she brought her lips up right by his ear. “Maybe you just need a distraction...” she whispered, nipping gently at his earlobe before reaching up to lay her hand softly against the side of his head, covering his ear to dampen the noise. Drawing back, she met his eyes only a moment before pressing her lips to his.